3/17/2011

Hello, ABC? Welcome to MY World!

And my lifetime of nasty painful dehumanizing complications that resulted from my being "corrected" at birth. In response to ABC News, let me tell you MY story about the results of "correcting" an intersexed child.

Crossposted on Pam's House Blend

Because my vagina was pinhole sized. They assumed I'd never get more than a pinky finger in it, much less a man's almighty penis, (which is sadly their main criteria when making these decisions; Will they be able to have "normal" hetero sex?), so they cauterized the mucous membranes with a heated metal rod and sewed up the tiny hole, leaving what visually appeared to be a normal if a wee bit below average penis and one testicle with a small scar.

Only my father was consulted. My mother was told they just needed to remove a growth. Except they failed to actually bother wasting any time doing silly things like a full internal examination. If they had they'd have found my uterus and maybe thought twice about the whole "She'll be happier as a boy" idea. (Helpful Hint; They were WRONG). Or they might have removed it and spared me a lot of grief.

I didn't actually know I was intersexed until 9 years ago while undergoing a full spate of physical tests at the gender clinic that used to be downtown in Vancouver before the BC Liberal stripped it of funding because it was "Frivolous spending". They discovered my true biology right at the same time they realized my blood disorder meant invasive surgeries would likely kill me.

See, until then, I had just thought I was a chronically ill MTF transsexual woman who had for some reason grown breasts. Sometimes I was actually stupid enough to believe I had breasts because I had somehow willed them to grow in my desire to be a girl. But around age 12 when they began growing, I started getting really sick every month. No doctor took me seriously because my parents told them I was probably faking to avoid school, (You can imagine how much I hated school, but still), and for years I never got thorough satisfactory answers or even seriously tested to see what was wrong with me. It's where I first learned to not trust doctors.

My problem? The uterus and my one ovary are functional. Imagine the joy of PMS when, thanks to sexist asshole binary enforcing doctors, the goddamn blood has NOWHERE to go. My body goes through painful PMS, then averages two weeks of chronic stomach pain and nausea as my body is forced to re-absorb blood it should be expelling, and because of my progressive blood disorder there's NO way this can be fixed now. So I'm doomed to a lifetime of needless suffering all because doctors thought they had a right to make that choice for me at birth.

If anyone has any questions about intersex from the horse's mouth, my e-mail is theaerie@shaw.ca

The worst part is that when I was FINALLY given access to my birth records, to learn exactly what was done, I learned I was years beyond any recourse to be compensated. The doctor who made the decision and lead the surgery had died 3 years before I found out, and every lawyer I consulted said no judge would hold the actual hospital accountable. My only comfort is knowing at least the bastard won't screw up anymore children ever again.

The choice should ALWAYS be the child's, when they're old enough to understand.

4 comments:

  1. Oh my fuck. How is this "correction" of intersex children not recognized and talked about for what it is - mutilation - all over the goddamn place at full volume? And how disgusting that the main determinant really seems to be about how well the child will be able to engage in hetero married sex as an adult.

    I am so very sorry for what was done to you. What absolute barbarism on the doctors' parts.

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  2. Not only is this mind-boggling, but I wonder how many times this has happened to others.

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  3. From a Priestess of Danu to the Shaman of Hedon, greetings my blessed sister!

    Having been a suspected recipient of some form of this surgical fiasco, and unable to access birth medical records, I can well relate how these "Dr.'s" are ruining the lives of many young men and women who were born with genitalia outside the normative. My own condition involves an endocrine system gone haywire along with a genetics that doesn't follow the family norm. According to all available data, I am probably a sufferer of PAIS.

    If you wish to converse, outreach@transangels.org is my work email. Your writing would be welcome.

    Leynda Erwin

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  4. TAT: I'm not Penny, but I would like to say a hearty "hullo!" from a Priest of the Mother. It's an odd situation to explain, but I'm fairly certain your post here was an omen confirming a few suspicions the girls and I had. Thank you!

    Sincerely, Alex

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Thanks for commenting, try to NOT be crude or mean-spirited. You can disagree with me without calling me a fat bitch etc.